So it's that time when, of the four boys, the last of the birthdays has come and gone. It's our fully adult and grown oldest son. Like all oldest kids, he's the trial and error child. Yes the oldest gets the most attention. Because everything is a first. Often you don't know what you're doing and each and every life event, milestone or blindside has to be dealt with on a scramble and improvise sort of way. By the time even the second child comes along, you have a feeling of 'been there, done that.' Not that each child won't bring his unique challenges and experiences that require punting and hoping for the best. But for the oldest everything requires such an approach.
That was certainly true with our oldest. Each of our sons has faced his own issues and even obstacles in life. Such is life for everyone. But I'll admit, sometimes I think our oldest son must have run over Life's dog at some point. From the day he was born it was jump from frying pan and avoid the fire.
He came home the second day after his birth because that's what insurance companies were doing at that point. New moms and newborns out the door after 24 hours. The problem is, he developed a late build up of fluids that, had he been in the hospital, they no doubt would have caught. As it was, on that night of his first day home he gave a giant gag and then promptly stopped breathing. Being brand new parents we had no clue what to do but panic. Fortunately my mother-in-law was staying with us. Being a veteran pro-parent, she swooped into action, flipped him upside down, and hit him like a Tom and Jerry cartoon until he choked out the liquids and began to breath again. We still shudder at what would have happened if she wasn't there. Needless to say, one thing I clearly supported Bill Clinton on was his putting the kibosh on insurance companies playing that little game.
Unfortunately for our son, it was only the beginning. And the first years of his life would see multiple hospital visits, doctor visits, infant surgeries and a host of other problems. His first pediatrician - perhaps the best ever - was just starting out and we were both new parents, so there was a bond there. We were also among his first patients. Plus we were there so often. I could have had my mail delivered to his office and not miss a beat. Eventually we moved out of the Ohio Valley and I believe that helped somewhat. But for the longest time he would be tripped up with health issues, and unfortunately it didn't just end when we came to Ohio.
Nonetheless, he has never given up. Once he gets going that is. Waiting until the 11th hour to charge forth is his is kryptonite. But once he throws himself in, he will typically go well beyond merely succeeding to full blown excelling. In school I told my sons to do good at many things - academics, arts or music, sports. And they mostly did. Our oldest, being the oldest, held out at first with the sports. He had played soccer as a youngster, but wasn't terribly brilliant at it. Both of his younger brothers were better. But he decided in 7th grade to go out for track. Yuck. It was sad to watch. I won't get into the details. But not to be discouraged, he asked me to coach him over the summer and he would try cross country in the fall. By the end of the season his next year, he was the second fastest in his school and one of the fastest in the district.
But that's been him. Readers of my blog know that he initially intended to go into the culinary world and be a chef. He has an innate knack for making meals better than most high class restaurants at which we've eaten. My wife and I say he broke eating out for us. Because there are few times we can't get him to make better than eating out. But just as he was going full throttle, he suddenly got hit with a catastrophic food allergy that all but put an abrupt end to such a career in any realistic way. Which obviously caused him a major setback.
Nonetheless, he kept plowing forward in school. He reconsidered his earlier thought of going into politics, since that was my initial college major back in the day. Nonetheless, I advised him that politics is like a demolition derby. It's a lot of fun to watch but I wouldn't want to drive in one. Eventually, through a strange series of events in various classes and opportunities, he began to be involved in immigration issues and all the hubbub in that area. He had already considered how to go into politics when he was younger, seeing the possibility of a law degree as the slingshot to go into the political world. Now he began to put things together, and so he is now where he is. He decided to revisit the idea of law school, but doing so to jump into that hot button of all topics today around international law and immigration.
So now he's in it, up to his neck. Owing to his grades from his undergrad days, he received a very hefty scholarship that takes care of the bulk of his schooling costs. So far, two boys through undergrad work and one going into his second year and not a brass farthing of student loans between them. All of our family chicanery has done some good. Though it's clear he isn't going to make it all the way through without needing some loans, added expenses and just living now being what it is.
Still, he's bounced back yet again, and is going full steam. He said he got through baby's first law exams and didn't do badly. So overall, once again, doing pretty well. Better than I would, that's for sure. But as a whole, I find my sons are typically better than me in most things, and I don't mind admitting that.





















