A shout out to our soon to be high schooler

High school bound!

And a happy and blessed birthday to him.  He is the last of our boys to go into high school.  Unlike his brothers, he has been homeschooled his entire life.  Sometimes we wish he had their experience. 

I've written before that we didn't start homeschooling because of any social issues or classroom content or such.  It was a bureaucratic breakdown that did noticeable harm to our second oldest.  During the breakdown, one of the administrators at the school actually told him, compared to the importance of the standardized tests, that his grades and classwork 'didn't really matter that much.'   The worst part?  She said this to cover the obvious mess their system had created, rather than just admit it and work with my son. 

At that point he was crushed, having been proud of maintaining not only perfect attendance, but straight As.  Now if you know our second oldest, you know his sometimes acerbic wit and fast thinking mind.  He is also our more sensitive son.  His grades began tanking that following year.  Soon, a kid who went ballistic when he got an A- was getting Bs and Cs and not caring.  One night I sat down when he was going to bed and expressed my concerns.  His response was classic him: 'I'm sorry, did you say my grades matter?  I have it on the best authority that they aren't important at all.'   Point and match.

That's when we decided to homeschool.  Being us, we didn't want to do it for some and not the others, even though our oldest was well into high school.  But he, too, concluded homeschooling would be preferable.  At that point, the schools weren't bat crazy insane, but the signs were developing.  

We announced we would homeschool after their Christmas break.  We would begin starting with the 2nd semester.  Between our announcement and the 2nd semester, their high school held an assembly.  Ostensibly it was against bullying, but the focus was on the LGBTQ community.  The message was clear.  The Pride Coalition could flaunt its views from the rooftops.  Any opposing views, however, could be seen as bullying.  And in our zero tolerance for bullying environment, the consequence could be punishments including, but not limited to, expulsion. 

So we weren't sad about our decision.  That's also why we decided not to start our youngest in public school.  Plus we always tended to keep the boys together.  Still there were times when we wondered about that.  

Because he was so close to graduating, when our oldest finished his schooling, we got together with a nearby homeschool group that was putting on its own graduation ceremony.  Even though we weren't part of it, they agreed to let him take part so he didn't miss out on what he was so close to experiencing in public school. 

I must admit, you could tell a difference between him and our sons and the other kids who were part of that group.  All of them had been homeschooled their entire lives.  When they put together a photo montage of all the students for the ceremony, our oldest was the only one with pictures of him in school settings, sports, band and the like.  Not only that, but there was a clear difference in experience and their life 'in the trenches' versus the kids who had always been homeschooled.

I wouldn't say that is a good or bad thing, but it was a different thing. And sometimes we wonder about our youngest not having 'been in the trenches.'   Nonetheless, it's fair to say most of his life has been a life apart from that which his older three brothers experienced.  Therefore we take the win and realize the overall benefits far outpace any potential void of experience that comes with not being in modern public schools.

So here's hoping it works.  I won't deny he has his quirks, some of which come from being outside the social mainstreams where schooling is concerned.  On the other hand, a thirteen year old who can set about fixing old retro-tech that the store owners can't, and who can reference Plato or Paul or Pavlov while being up on the latest Mario release isn't bad either.  Whatever he may have lost, times being what they are, I think we'll keep what he's received here at the homestead.